Showers are great for thinking.
I feel fresh and new and wiped clean.

Eric's funeral passed.
I missed it, but that's okay.
I talked and talked and talked until my jaw fell off.
But, I'm okay.
It's easier to talk about,
easier to smile when I think of him.

Thank you, for holding me when I cried,
Thank you, for standing by me.
Thank you...for not giving up on me.
You know who you are...
But are most likely never going to read this.

I'm ready for college,
Ready for a new start.
I realize that I've been...at a standstill.

What I thought I wanted...I don't.
I've been trying to fill something
that I don't need to.
Don't want to.
I realize this,
and am happy.

I want to get myself real high.
I want to get so far off the ground that my hair gets caught on cloud dust.
Cloud dust is that stuff that clouds leave behind when they're floating real fastacross the sky.
That's what I want.
Cloud dust.

I want a joint so the bones in my hands will stop shaking under my sking.
That's what I need-
new joints.

Maybe I'm writing this because I want to scream "I'm Here!"